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Ounce for ounce Fritos have more calories than any other food in the planet.  They also happen to make great fire starters, I’ve even used them to cook my coffee in an empty tuna can and to this day they still only have three ingredients, corn, oil and salt.  Call it junk food but it’s always been my go to survival rations. Be-it after a long day sailing in the relentless sun or a pavement pounding hill climbing 80 miler into the wind and up hill the whole way on Brompty.  I get my sodium fix, calories and they just taste good, I prefer the scoops and use then to shovel spoonfuls of tuna into my pie hole. 


Reading though dozens of bags on the self I can’t believe how many ingredients all the other Chips have, even the so called natural ones.  I grab my bag of Fritos and am reminded of the simplicity of my trusty Brompton, six gears is enough. Most bikes these days have thirty gears and fragile and sensitive derailers, WHY?  As humans are we that lazy the we want to completly remove the experience of hill climbing from our lives.  Why do we always need to add more expense, complexity and weight to something as simple as riding a bike?  If my knees weren’t blown I never would have sold my trusty fixe but let’s face it, none of us are getting any younger.  

My Brompton has a three speed internal hub with a high low derailer giving six speeds.  She was designed for commuting and while she did fine in my 750 Mile fully loaded tour through Hawaii I’m reducing her gearing by 12% which is easy as switching from a 50 tooth chain ring to a 44 and clipping a few of the chain links giving me a bit of extra oomf for the hills and head winds we expect cycling the west coast. Neither of us will train for this ride other than just playing around the island so the first few weeks will be a very rude awakening.

Our loads will be as simple and minimal as our bikes with just one extra set of clothes so I can only imagine how stinky we will be but we have already vowed to skinny dip every body of water we cross in an attempt to save money We neednt spend for such silly luxury as showers.  We will be fully dirbaging it as we each only set off with a grand and want to make this trip last as long as out bodies can hold out.  There are people out there who go to great lengths to never be to hot or too cold.  To never be afraid or push the limits behind thier boundarys.  To never take a chance in finding a true adventure, we are not those people, we are gypsy lovers and this is our dirtbag diary.

Fritos scoops 9 ounce bag, average price $2.50

1200 calories

270 calories from fat

45% RDA sodium

32% dietary fat

18 grams of protein 

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