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I bought Chloe a brand new Subaru for her first birthday, before the end of the first week she had ripped  out the steering colum to the tune of serveral thousand dollars but that was only the tip of the iceberg compared to what I paid in bribes to keep her in my divorce settlement.  I didn’t care about the house, the money or any of the personal belongings that took me a lifetime to obtain, I just wanted that fluffy little monster that made my world so frustratingly perfect.

A Brittany came running down the dock right up to me and after a good ear scratch she layed down on my foot the way Chloe used to do, I almost had a breakdown, I miss that little fucker so much words can not describe.  They say it gets easier with time, it doesn’t.  With every passing day I miss her more and more and think about her more often. For a long time I tried to block it all but I simply can’t, I miss my baby, always :(…

I miss the life I created for her and our back woods adventures together, eating road kill, living in a snow cave and section hiking the pacific crest trail.  She was the best companion a man could have.  It’s been a year since that horrible day when she went to that big fiend in the sky and I’ve been saving a special bottle a friend gave to me, for what I didn’t know but tonight I will toast my best friend with a bottle of red appropriately named Chloe, the girl who changed not only who and what I am but also how I see the world.  I have a book in me but I’m not so sure I’m ready to share our adventures with the world.

She would always eat my cooking, never said no to a few extra miles on the trail and was great for treeing a bear in my campsite if a treed bear in your camp site is what you want.  She was always up to some form of shinanigans and taught me that life is to short to follow the rules.  I’d sneak her into bars and restaurants and we would both get kicked out.  Our winter in a back country cabin snowshoeing through heavy power on a daily basis was one of the best times of my life.  She would always jump on the back of my snow shoes tripping me face first into to deep snow and then jump on my back to play.  Mornings were steam roller time when she would pounce on me and wake me up for coffe and dog chow.  

On one famous backpacking trip where all I brought were a pack of hot dogs and a sleeping bag she crawled into a dead deer carcas just before sunset. I did the best to clean her that I could but it was impossible, then the mosquitos came out in force.  We dove into my sleeping bag wet stinky dog and all and I said to her, at least it’s not raining, then the Hevens opened up, there was no place I would have rather been.  My favorite Mountian biking trail was 40 miles long and she would lap me the whole time.  We climbed every mountain, sailed all over the country and Mexico together and did the worlds best road trip.

My heart is still hurting these days but I always feel like she is close by, keeping an eye on me and reminding me that none of us will get out of this world alive.  Her daily memories remind  me to love unconditionally, play every day and to wake up with an explosion for another day and the gift of life.  I salute you Chloe, cheers my friend and thank you for teaching me that while life might not be fair it’s the greatest gift any of us could ever ask for.

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive.

—Gilda Radner

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